Woo Hoo, today I celebrate the 18th Anniversary of my life here since being diagnosed with a Brain Tumour so large I had three months left to live.
(This is the size I thought my tumor was, but unknown to me it was 3 times bigger!)
This time 18 years ago I underwent an 17 hour operation in which the ENT surgeon went through my left ear canal removed all of my inner ear to get to my tumour which was wrapped around my brain stem and had been growing for so many years it had misshapen my skull. Then my wonderful Neurologist held my brain in his hand whilst getting the bulk of the tumor out.....after that he took the fat from my stomach and made a pad around my brain stem where he lovingly placed my brain on to rest.....forever.
As I tell you this I am overcome with love, joy and excitement with what this tumour has given me. The tumour was so large they could not get it all out and over the last 17 years life's been a bit of a roller coaster where I've had to have radiation and monitoring.
BUT last year a miracle happened, I went to see my radiologist, and whilst sitting in the reception area I heard my Dr calling out "where's the miracle woman?" "I'm here" I called back (as I truly believe I am a miracle) and he said no I'm not joking I can't see it .....IT'S GONE!
So now I live a life without my little friend that was in my head. Like Wayan says "that God he have schedule Mam".
It just so happens that today is also Bali's Independence Day, how's that?
I come to a country that also celebrates on the 17th of August, at the risk of sounding corny I also celebrate my Independence......of self, what I mean is my tumour gave me courage, courage to live the best life I could for myself independent of what I was taught growing up, the shoulds and should nots, the how could you's and the ....blah blah blah's. I was Free! Free to be whoever I wanted to be and to embrace every day as a new start.
Guess what! We have a car!! Well a midget kinda toy car, but it's a car!
We have rented a Suzuki Karimun, Carrymoon in Balinese, it's a bit sahkit (sick) ie: it needed an oil change, new tyres, new lights and stuff for the radiator....hopefully that's it for a while but hey it only costs us $100 a month and is so much better than the scooter when it rains!!!
Wayan is so happy he's been doing lessons for the last couple of weeks, and we're still waiting for his license to appear as it takes some time but shouldn't be too long as we slipped a few extra thousand rupee of encouragement for the Police to process it.
In the meantime if the Police pick us up (happened yesterday whilst on the way to the airport) we just slip another couple of thousand and all is well!!!
Will keep you posted on our travels, happy days.
I dedicate this blog to my amazingly wonderful family and friends who if not for them I would not be here today, as you can have the best surgeons in the world but it's love, prayer, hope and positivity that truly saves your life and these people (you know who you are) gave that to me in bucket loads.
THANKYOU
J.
Ahhh my beautiful and very dear friend, Jacqueline. I remember the day of the Mundaring car rally and you began feeling light headed and dizzy, "No i'll be fine Tricia, I just need a minute, lying back on the seat" you didn't want to let anyone down and leave. I said "Harry, you need to take Jackie (your name back then) home, she really isn't well." I said to my husband "Geoff I'm really worried about Jac, something isn't right." I was meant to be with you that day baby. After doctors and tests, I remember exactly what you said to me, it went.. "Trishy I don't want you to feel sorry for me, everything is fine, it's ok but I have a tumour in my head, its about the size of an egg and its wrapped around the base of my brain." The thoughts rushing through my head at that moment, WHAT? no, not you, not Jacqueline, I felt tears welling in my eyes, blinking lots and swallowing them back. I felt shocked but heard this amazingly positive girls words loud and clear. If I was going to be anything other than positive she would have fobbed me off nothing surer. Jacqueline wanted and needed, uplifting and encouraging people around her.
ReplyDeleteJacqueline surrounded herself with spiritual and like minded people, her journey of filling her life with good things, love and light truly began and there was no way of ever going back. She told me "This tumour is a message from the universe, It is here to show me I have to take charge of my own life and future, create my own peace, slow down, listen to her body, listen to her higher self, be open, receive messages however they were delivered and act on them. We learnt together, nothing was ever a coincidence. Everything happened for a reason and for our best. There is more that I could talk about like seeing you in hospital after your surgery but no need. You sure are a "Miracle Woman" Jacqueline.
Our beautiful friend you have shared and taught so many of us a new way to live our lives, you are a gift from god. I've learnt from you about 'Keeping It Real' "This isn't fantasy fucking island Tricia Jane." my favourite words from you I use often and the next best ones are with a stern look on your face you asking me "Who the fuck did I think I was?" Ahhhh you are out of this world, we share such a unique, REAL and totally honest as the day is long friendship.
Which brings me to this, congratulations on the new wheels but I don't want to drive in your Mr Bean car. Part of my joy, little giggles to myself and a continual smile on my face under the helmet that I couldn't do up was riding on the back of Kens scooter following behind you, watching wonder woman, weave in and out, tooting at who needed a toot riding through those beautiful mountains. A car will be as boring as batshit ALRIGHT?
What a celebration today is...WOW. Keep on enjoying this beautiful woman beautiful Bali people. It's true what Wayan says about God and schedules :) Keep up that good driving Wayan.
Big love and hugs to Sibby and Curty, you went through so much which no doubt makes up a part of who you are today....look at what a mother you have that you lovingly adore hey....I know you both love life and follow your dreams to, it gets hectic and a bit messy for us all at times but we are all so lucky to have your mumma now and forever. Hang in their Walt ahaha BIGGGG hugs and kisses. Think I might go celebrate with a glass of wine right now too as I think about some of our most funny and somewhat naught times we've shared together. xoxoxox Love you lots
I just wrote you a response to your wonderful blog and the f.....g computer sent me off on a tangent via Google and lost the whole thing! Shall send you an email - at least I know how to do that - haha! Thanks for your wonderful, beautiful, inspiring and uplifting news - it makes me smile and smile and smile. Luv ya, A
ReplyDelete